The Wise Hat: Random Uses For Animal Crackers

English: Stauffer's Animals Crackers

1. Throw them at people you like
2. Throw them at people you don’t like
3. See how many you can fit in your bra
4. Have a parade
5. Put them in soup and sing about it
6. Name them
7. Make them mate and imitate the noises
8. Pretend they’re your friends because you’re a loser who plays with animal crackers all day so you have none
9. Break off their heads and exchange them with others
10. See if they can float and for how long
11. Leave a trail of them behind you so you don’t get lost
12. Shove them up your nose
13. Eat them with various condiments
14. See how many you can fit into a balloon
15. Make them act out Dancing with the Stars
16. Throw them into the toilet to help teach your son how to aim
17. Use them as bait to catch a dragon
18. Use them as treats to train your dragon
19. Write a comic strip about them
20. Crush them and smoke them
21. Direct a safari show
22. Take pictures of them in random places
23. Make frames out of them for said pictures
24. Paint the donkeys blue
25. Paint the elephants red then step on them
26. Cook them
27. Reward your husband with them when he takes out the trash
28. Reward your dog with them when he doesn’t pee on the kids
29. Tape them to your neighbor’s front door
30. Mail them to random people from the phonebook

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The Photographer Hat: Top 5 Things You Should NOT Do During a Session

… but I do them on a regular basis.

1. Forget to take the lens cap off.
I especially love when my clients don’t inform me of this but my lens is pointing straight at them. No, it’s not a new style of photography, your photographer is just a doofus. This is like Photography 101 Step 1.

2. Tell your clients to get on their knees (or some other direction that sounds worse than you meant.)
Instead phrase it more strategically like “Let’s try going down on your knees for a better angle…”

3. Let your 1 year old run amok in the studio while shooting.
You may just end up with a shadow of a small child on the backdrop that will not only add to editing time but look a little creepy.

4. Assume all of your clients share your twisted sense of humor.
This can get awkward fast. Not everyone will smile when you tell them to pretend the person next to them farted or think you swearing at your equipment is funny.

5. Leave your videographer at home.
You never know when your client’s dog will start humping you and you missed a valuable piece to your “behind the scenes” reel.

If there is one piece of advice I could give to people who hire a photographer it would be this: We’re all human and we all can be a little stupid or embarrassed sometimes. Have fun with your session because we’re laughing with you not at you. I swear (oops).

What are some things you’ve done as a photographer or been witness to as a client/model that were completely stupid and/or embarrassing?

The Wise Hat: Cinematic Romance vs. Reality

Several people have asked me why my save-the-dates haven’t been sent out yet. Part of the reason is simply because I’m a very good procrastinator with a dash of forgetfulness. Another part is that I can’t make up my mind which ones I want. The last part… well the last part is maybe a case of cold feet. Truthfully, our relationship has been on the rocks since the Boss was born. We’ve had up times and down times and right now is a down time. Sometimes I can’t help but wonder if it’s all in my head.

As women, we have been trained by hollywood on what a relationship is supposed to look like. I’m grown enough to understand that that’s not what real life is like and relationships aren’t perfect. But don’t you think that maybe a shred of it might be true? I would like to know what happy couples look like. Real life happy couples. How much do they kiss? How much do they smile? How many times a week do they have sex?

In the Sex and the City movie when they are sitting around together talking about the state of Samantha’s relationship…

Samantha Jones: Relationships aren’t just about being happy. I mean, how often are you happy in your relationship?
Charlotte York: Every day.
Samantha Jones: Every day?
Charlotte York: Well, not all day every day but yes, every day.

How true is this? Because of this is 100% true I might be in trouble.

What about you committed folk: Are you happy every day?

The Girl Hat: Mr. Yummy November 2012

This will be the first of my monthly ‘Mr. Yummy’ awards. These awards purely serve as eye candy to look forward to every month for us girls (and guys!) Look for it every 1st of the month and I know it will make your day.

This month we are celebrating… *drumroll*

Ryan Gosling

Born: Ryan Thomas Gosling on November 12th, 1980 (Scorpio power!) in Ontario, Canada (oh, Canada!)

Most Known For: “Drive”, “The Ideas of March”, “Crazy, Stupid Love”, “Blue Valentine”, and “The Notebook”

Random Fact: Gosling was arrested by LAPD officers on March 17, 2005. Gosling pleaded “no contest” to a misdemeanor charge of “exhibiting speed”, despite being originally charged with “driving under the influence of alcohol and/or drugs” and “driving with a blood alcohol content of 0.08 or greater.” He was sentenced to two years of probation and ordered to pay $849 in fines. (Thanks Wikipedia!)

You’re welcome. See you next month!

The Mom Hat: Thanksgiving 2012

On The Menu This Year:
Cornish Game Hens  with Garlic and Rosemary cooked in the slow cooker on High for 4 hours
Stuffing
Watergate Salad with minced Cranberries instead of Pecans
Candied Sweet Potatoes
Canned Jellied Cranberry Sauce
and the classic Green Bean Casserole

Compared to some people’s menus that I’ve seen, ours was pretty tame. One of my friends posted theirs on Facebook and it included at least 3 meat items. Who does that? Seriously? Maybe I just like simplicity.

I made the hens in the slow cooker to make my life easier and planned on transferring them to the oven to brown them in the end. By the time I was ready to throw them in, though, they were so tender that they just fell apart with every attempt to lift them out of the crock. Still amazing.

Yet again, dinner was ready late (7pm instead of 6:30) so The Boss was unable to break bread with us. I told Tripper that we’re going to be normal people next year and eat Thanksgiving dinner at 3pm.

Why is that anyway? Why do we eat so obnoxiously early on the holidays? It’s more like Thanksgiving Lunch than dinner.

Thanksgiving dessert became post-Thanksgiving breakfast.

I can’t wait until next year when the Boss and I will be making gratitude leaves.

On a sadder note, there was not much to be thankful for in our eyes this year. Last year was my first Thanksgiving after my dad had passed away and this year was the first without my Uncle Hilary as well. It’s difficult being without family on the holidays which is one of the reasons I want to create such a big one. Someday years in the future, my home will be filled with the laughter of all my children (perhaps their own as well) and my table will be surrounded by enough family to make sure no one ever feels alone. For now, we are thankful for the roof over our heads, the love in our hearts, the family that we do have, and the ability to live in financial comfort.

What were you thankful for this year?

The Mom Hat: Relay For Life 2012

official logo of the American Cancer Society R...

This was our first year participating in Relay For Life and we decided to hold a photo booth for onsite fundraising. The photo booth was a big success, everyone looked fabulous and we raised even more for Relay. A special thank you to Alicia and Helen for finding a place for our tent and making the arrangements, it means a TON!

On a more personal note, it’s been a long time since I experienced something as powerful as this. There’s nothing more moving than seeing so many people come together to share, support, give, and fight for the same cause. When I stood next to my best friend in the luminaria ceremony we watched as everyone light their own luminaries to honor or memory of their loved ones and for me it was very bittersweet. I felt grief for the loss of so many and for the loss of my own, hope for the ones who are beating it and, at the same time, not so alone anymore. I lit a luminary in memory of my mother, who lost her fight in 1999; I held the hand of my best friend, who is full of strength and fighting every day.

This is such an important cause and I can’t wait for next year!

The Mom Hat: March For Babies 2012!

I’m excited to announce our first year participating in March for Babies!

You can participate with us through our March For Babies Mini-Sessions!
Sponsor our team with a donation of $25 or more and receive a FREE mini-session!
These are one hour sessions in studio or on location (within 25 miles of 60061) and include Limited Images on DVD.
Donations of $50 or more will also receive one FREE 8×10 from their mini-session.
Contact us for more details and mention the March For Babies Mini-Sessions.

The mission of March of Dimes is to improve the health of babies by preventing birth defects, premature birth and infant mortality. Funds raised in March for Babies support research and programs that help moms have full-term pregnancies and babies begin healthy lives. And they will be used to bring comfort and information to families with a baby in newborn intensive care.

The Mom Hat: Noah’s First Easter

I’m starting to appreciate the fact that Noah will know very little about what’s going on for the first year of his life. That gives me time to practice holidays. Nevertheless this was Noah’s (technically) first Easter. So of course, I did what all new moms do, and stuck him in an Easter onesie and silly Easter ears.

Uploaded from the Photobucket iPad App

Being as busy as I have been, I managed to decorate the dining room and kitchen for today. If you’re wondering I basically got everything from Target. They had the cutest Easter stuff this year.

Uploaded from the Photobucket iPad App

My first attempt at a layered cake…..

Uploaded from the Photobucket iPad App

It’s a strawberry cake with buttercream icing and coconut sprinkled on top. I colored the icing in between the layers pastel green and the outside pastel blue. We were so full from dinner we have yet to try it.

Unfortunately, Noah wasn’t able to sit with us for dinner because mommy read the wrong directions and we ate very very late. I accidentally read the cooking directions on the glazing packet which said to cook for 10 minutes. This seemed plausible since the ham is full cooked. Nope. The real directions were inside the plastic wrap. Really? Who puts directions INSIDE a sealed ham? Lesson learned. It came out awesome anyway.

Uploaded from the Photobucket iPad App

I hope everyone else had a terrific day and got to spend time with everyone they love. Happy Easter everyone! (except those who don’t like easter)